Croix Sather

Part 3: How to Stay Positive in a Negative World

What happens when something ends up in your face that drives you nuts?

 

This may be a car cutting you off on the highway, or someone budging in line at the store, or someone saying something that you strongly disagree with.

 

When I took Marshall Sylver ’s Turning Point seminar, he said, “It is better to be happy than right.” At first I didn’t get it. I want to be happy and right. As the course went on, and additional seminars I went to taught by Marshall, I got it.

 

In my younger years, I would have said something sarcastic to the person cutting in line or insisted that I am next and defend my spot in line until the end. When someone went on a political rant, I would have to defend my team. As time goes by and you learn from your mistakes and your successes, you start to make more profitable decisions. Profit can be financial and it can be emotional, physical, and psychological.

 

What is more profitable or beneficial to your life (and blood pressure) – getting into an argument or just letting it go?

You have three basic choices:

1 – Get your point across and prove that you are right with the aggravation that goes with it and possible escalation that could turn into a mess.

2 – You can keep it inside and let it stew. This causes tons of physiological problems including short and long-term health and relationship issues.

3 – You can just be happy and let the situation go. As philosopher Leo Tolstoy said, “If you want to be happy, be.”

 

There is no good or bad in any situation. Seriously. There is only the meaning that you give to it. Most of us give the same meaning to tragedies  - that it is bad, sad, unfair, or the like. Others give it different meanings. Such as the person doing the harm may get pleasure out of it. Right or wrong, my point is that events are events. You get to CHOOSE the meaning you give to it.

 

Someone cuts in line, it may be intentional or unintentional. It really doesn’t matter. The way you react to matters and it is your choice. You can yell at him. You can keep it inside and get mad all day about it. Or you can say to yourself, “Hmm, that is interesting, I wonder if he knows he just took my place in line? He must be in a bigger rush than I am.” And then you let it go.

 

When you focus your energy on the little inconsequential events of your day, you take away from the important things in your life. You cannot have a bad day because this happened and that happened to you and turn a switch and leave it all behind when you come home. If it is affecting your day, it is also going to affect the rest of your life. That means your family, relationships, friends, health … everything.

 

Focus your energy into the things that matter. Having a better relationship with those you love. Making more money so you can afford the important things in life to share with those you love, such as a vacation, or a better house. And focus on your purpose in life. What is your calling? Starting a business, a new invention, raising awareness for a cause, teaching others, or is it something else? Don’t know what your calling is? Then focus on figuring that out.

Part 2: How to Stay Positive in a Negative World

How does it feel now that you are staying more positive since my last article? I bet it feels great. You are well on your way to being naturally positive and upbeat. You are now limiting the news, media, and junk TV. You’re ‘devouring power’ by incorporating powerful influences from biographies and videos of truly successful and inspirational people. This means you are ready to take the next step.

 

You have probably already realized that you have changed. And you also realize that others around you have not. Most likely, they do not want to either. Not yet anyway.

 

There are two ways to feel good about yourself. You can build yourself up or you can do what most people do and tear others down.

 

What are your coworkers, friends and family like?
Are the supportive and positive or are they negative and tear you and others down?

 

To reach the next level and become a truly positive, upbeat and happy person, you have to be selective about who you spend time with. This may require some uncomfortable choices. Growth is not in being comfortable; growth comes from doing what needs to be done.

 

You are the average of the five people you hang with the most.
Who are your closest five and what are they like?

 

If your closest five are not raising you up, if they are not inspiring you to be more and do better, then they are bringing you down. You may choose to lose those people that are bringing you down.

 

There are many reasons that people don’t want you to become more and become happier. A few people are just mean or so deeply entrenched in a negative lifestyle that they attack everyone. Most people are simply reacting to life. When someone else becomes more, it is a reaction to joke or judge. When someone else succeeds that person is reminded of how unfulfilling their life is and how little they are doing to improve it.

 

Those who love you may want to ‘protect’ you. Consciously or subconsciously, family and friends may try to keep you from getting your hopes up and then see you disappointed. When this is the case, those people are projecting their past experiences or personal future expectations on to you. Your family and close friends may also be afraid that if you become more, that you won’t want to be around them any longer because you will have less in common. They may be afraid that they will lose your love. This is why you need to become so great that you inspire them to become great as well and assure them your love is here to stay.

 

If others are in the habit of tearing you down, you will need to make the decision to keep those people in your life or not. If it is family, you may choose to limit your exposure to them or set new boundaries. When you are with them, have your positive force field up so they cannot project their negative beliefs onto you.  If it is your friends … well, it’s time to find new friends.

 

Life is too short and precious to keep company with negative naysayers.
You are awesome and you deserve to be the best and be friends with the best.

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Positively Positive - Croix Sather

How to Stay Positive in a negative world

It isn’t easy staying positive and upbeat. It really isn’t … not at first anyway. The great news: once you learn how to be positive it becomes a snowball effect and you become more positive and powerful.

We live in a world where negativity is becoming the norm. The media consistently highlights the gloom, doom and drama of life because it gets eyes. Shocking news gets viewers. At work coworkers love to complain and find the fault in everything. Few advertisements inspire you to buy a product. Instead most ads scare you into buying a product with fear advertising or competitor bashing.

Why do you want to stay positive?
Because life is so much better, you will live longer and healthier, and you achieve more of your dreams and become more successful. The law of attraction applies only to those who are ready to receive. If you are positive you will attract more positive. If you are negative you will attract more negative. Which one would you prefer?

Rules to easily stay positive

1 – Lose the News.

What ever happen to feel good news? Where are the positive stories of people overcoming adversity, cancer, and setting new personal records? I used to be a news junkie, especially politics. Now I rarely turn it on. If it is important, someone will tell you about it. I always know when it is going to snow two days before it does because you cannot go into a Starbucks without hearing others talk about. It is as if they having seen snow in New England before.

2 – Lose the Tube

TV, AKA the Drama box. Most television programming is negative drama for the same reasons, it sells better. Out of curiosity I watched a recent episode of Desperate housewives and I admit, the story was gripping. A plane crashed into Wisteria Lane. After watching the whole hour (an hour I can never get back), I realized that there is nothing positive, motivational, or inspirational in the show. A couple is fighting, he dies of a heart attack, multiple people are cheating on each other, someone is plotting the death of someone else, extortion and so.

Not the junk I want wandering around in my subconscious.

Garbage in = Garbage out. Be careful what you watch.

3 – Devour Power

Become well read in works of text art. Read (or use audio books) about people who have achieved great success, great happiness, great purpose, or overcome great adversity. A recent favorite of mine is “The Noticer” by Andy Andrews. Read biographies of our greatest leaders and achievers. They can be historical or contemporary. What you will find is that those who achieve the most and those who are the happiest have common traits such as finding the positive in every event.

Your “INNER GAME”

What about your ‘inner game’? What about reprogramming your mind to naturally stay positive so it is not a battle. You can easily stop the limited programming like “with my luck” and “why does this always happen to me.” This article series will end with "How to Win Your Inner Game"

Stay tuned for Part 2:

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Celebrate Life,
Croix Sather